Identity is what I talk about now as I look back on my old bios. Who I was as relating to other people (wife / mother / lover). Who I was by what badges I have earned (Wharton MBA / Notable Essayist / Editor in Chief / COO). Yes I knew something about myself (writer) but some things I did not know.

My tagline for a decade read, “finding magic every day.” As you may see I have changed it.

I stop hunting and start creating. I do not know when I do that exactly but if you read my essays maybe the roots begin when I start using present tense. A beautiful essay that moves from present to past to future and back to present again: this is the essay of a creator.

I am a witch. Many times I say this and it is not understood. I am not a fairy or a sprite, I am not a doer of evil. I do not (very often) wear a pointy hat. I create: relationships, futures for myself, opportunities, tour guests who will tell me their secrets and let me in turn tell them their futures, challenges for myself, a lot of drama entirely by accident, little stories that are matched with pictures, friends and friends of friends, enemies without wanting to, children. Really what I want to create is truth and beauty and love.

Sarah Gilbert creating in the spring
photo Edwin Skaug, I have not let him edit this yet

I birthed three children who live with me and are terrifically smart and full of creativity and personality and life and not a little emotional ups and downs. While in school each one of them has had an IEP throughout their educational journey for entirely different reasons and I will leave it at that for now but it is most definitely part of my identity. I have taken more children into my circle of love and protection. Some have left again, not of my choosing, I miss them and this too is part of my identity. That loss.

I am not saying any more, “I have three boys,” I don’t think that describes each of them precisely in the way they would like. Thus far they are all comfortable using “he/him” pronouns but I think for at least one of them that might change.

I like to ride a bike and walk and take the bus more than I like to drive, but thanks to a tour company I founded my annual mileage is more than your average outside salesperson. I call myself a “bicycle evangelist” still, I believe riding a bike improves happiness and long life, I believe our culture would do well to slow down and riding a bike; especially while carrying passengers; can help. I own the web sites “” and “” … and need to recreate the pages to which they point.

The boxes that I check with regards to “marital status” say I must check “divorced” even though this is not my identity. I do not much like marriage (I very much like partnered love), why should I have to identify with unbinding it? “I would have been better without marriage” — why is there no box for that?

After my divorce, I get a job as a bike tour guide. This is a line from my essay, “Invasive Species.” Now I identify as a bike tour guide, a hiking tour guide, and any number of other sorts of tour guides. “Tour guide extraordinaire.”

I am still, I have always been, a writer.

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